Thursday, August 31, 2006

Cash on Delivery

Thursday, August 31, 2006

Here in the UK we have this half-baked, government-run get rich quick scheme called 'child benefit'. To qualify for this handout you don't need to be homeless, destitute or disabled, only to be the guardian of a child under the age of 16, or a 'big kid' under the age of 19 who is in full time education. Your first-born sprog is worth £17.45 a week and any additional ones earn a bonus windfall of £11.70 a week, all tax free. Child benefit isn't means tested in any way so a billionaire duke - in the eyes of the law - is just as entitled to it as an unemployed, wheelchair-bound single mother. I'm sure some of their ilk must claim it too as statistics reveal that child benefit is taken up by nearly 100% of the eligible population.

Rewarding strangers for exacerbating Britain's overcrowding crisis will cost tax-payers an estimated £10.153 billion between 2006 and 2007 (according to the HM Revenue & Customs Spring 2006 Departmental Report). It makes me wonder what other luxury items it's possible to claim compensation for. For instance, is there a champagne allowance I'm not aware of? I hope so - why should I spend my own money when I could liberate some of yours?



Is that to encourage natality? That sure is a very generous amount.


Yes, originally the scheme was brought into effect to restore the birth rate after the second world war. 61 years later still no-one has remembered to plug the leak.

Now people see it as a Flying Spaghetti Monster given right rather than a last resort safety net. Instead of working out if they can afford to have kids before popping them out, people have them and then consider the state of their finances.

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