A whole bunch of dumb

Too long ago in this very galaxy I attended a junior school where it was deemed acceptable practice to torture the kids. The teachers were the worst; one technique was to force us to memorise dozens of the most common collective nouns for no greater purpose than being able to regurgitate them under test conditions. There are literally hundreds of weird and wonderful (and often counter...

Read More

A monkey in sheep's clothing

Have you ever wondered how Monkey Island II might have looked if Bill Tiller - Curse of Monkey Island's lead background artist - had been let loose with a paintbrush six years earlier? A heck of a lot like this (dead link removed) imagines 21 year old web developer, Jennifer Gleu from Hanover, Germany. In cahoots with a handful of volunteer programmers and story-writers, Jennifer, or BlackBat as...

Read More

Twitterers' tweets are twaddle

The winners of the 161m EuroMillions jackpot were today identified as Colin and Chris Weir of Largs in Ayrshire, proving that paying attention to anything said on Twitter is strictly for the birds. Largs is actually 500 miles from Clacton so I wouldn't even advise - dubiously anonymous Tweeters - to hold their breath waiting for a close guess rosette. As wild a suggestion as this is, next time, maybe...

Read More

Why dead-tree newspapers need an unfollow button

Far more predictable than death and taxes is the likelihood of a story alluding to the opinion of some random, uninformed Tweeter featuring in commuter's choice (because it's free), the Metro newspaper. Below is a prime example... Does EuroMillions winner come from Clacton? Twitter abuzz with rumours Twitter...

Read More

Don't phone, it's just for fun

Is it just me or are the 'blink and you'll miss it' disclaimers you find sandwiching TV shows often more entertaining than the actual shows? This one is taken from the seminal episode of the Irish version of Dragons' Den. That the producers have gone to the trouble of pointing out that "no offer is being made to or solicited from the viewing audience" suggests to me that in previous shows, someone,...

Read More

Gesundheit

A lot like throwing up when you're exposed to the music of Justin Bieber, sneezing is inextricably acknowledged with a knee-jerk 'bless you'. The sneezer - for reasons which escape me - is expected to be so grateful they feel obliged to say thank you. If someone sneezes and you let it go without reacting...

Read More

Migraine aura

I'm so grateful to ABC News for screening Grammy Award reporter Serene Branson's on-air 'stroke' episode because now the condition I've been suffering from for the last 13 years has spontaneously become real. Before now I must have been delusional. As news correspondent David Wright says in the clip, that's the "medical mystery solved and a happy ending for this news reporter". That's that done...

Read More