Very shortly all you lucky readers will have the unique opportunity to purchase a hand-selected assortment of retro-gaming related collectables such as crocheted Amiga characters, bead art, Lego dioramas of famous game scenarios, key-rings, badges, t-shirts and so on. All officially endorsed by your favourite blogger. That's me. Shut up.
African orphans enjoying their complimentary, prototype retro crates. Note the beaming smiles - I put those there, proving this is a genuine offer.
The icing on the cake will be high-fidelity MP9 versions of my videos, complete with director's commentary, and Ludovico-style speculas to accompany my RetroWaffle game reviews.
Plus. PLUS!!! The first three early adopters will receive an exclusive, signed, glow in the dark Funko Pop Vinyl Bobblehead of yours truly, and a first edition Coleco Chameleon console (subject to availability).
This tricked-out shoebox-sized manna from heaven will be shipping in early June, so don't delay, subscribe today!
Yours for an entirely reasonable $299 per month!
You'd be a fool to miss out!