Showing posts with label Nigel Hawthorne. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Nigel Hawthorne. Show all posts

Thursday, 16 July 2020

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I find your lack of... ticket sales, disturbing

Dallben the Enchanter discovers that the Horned King, abominable overlord of Prydain, is conspiring to secure a mystical relic known as the Black Cauldron. Its location is a mystery so, obviously, he requires an anthropomorphic pig (Hen Wen) embued with oracular powers to guide him to the prize. Assuming this comes to pass, the Horned King will possess the almighty power to raise a subservient army of undead cauldron-born warriors who he expects will be remarkably handy in his pursuit to conquer the world.

Dallben's solution to counter the menace is to draft in his naive, teenaged, assistant swineherder, Taran, who can barely muster the fortitude to swing an adult sword, let alone command a defence league. Nevertheless, it all works out tickety-boo since this is a Disney jaunt and they weren't going to let their starring protagonist come to any harm after spending $25-44 million on the lavish project, designating it the most expensive animated production of its era. It was still a flop, and not fondly remembered today largely because the cast are so bland and forgettable. Magnificently animated and illustrated, of course, and above all else, intriguing because it's so dark considering the target market.

In 1986, a year later, Sierra On-Line snagged the gaming conversion rights, producing a primitive, yet perfectly solid puzzle-solving adventure game aimed at a younger audience. As in the movie, Taran takes the lead in an effort to rescue his pignapped pal and slay the Horned King before he can push the big red apocalypse button, opening the gates of hell without employing a bouncer to maintain a semblance of decorum amongst the party guests.

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Friday, 10 July 2020

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Looks like there's a new shepherd in town!

Sylvester Stallone is the Demolition Man; a no-nonsense, hard-nosed cop of limited wordage who doesn't believe in treading lightly. Framed for the manslaughter of multiple hostages by a psychopathic career criminal who looks remarkably like Wesley Snipes, the cat and mouse share the same incarcerated fate for their involvement. In 1996 they are cryogenically frozen, subjected to 36 years of subliminal rehabilitation therapy before being revived for a parole hearing. Phoenix (probably played by Snipes in fact), escapes into a seemingly utopian Brave New World where crime has been eliminated. With no experience of real crimefighting, present-day cops are as much use as a chocolate teapot, obliging the powers that be to release Sly into the community to recapture him and restore law and order.

Two years following the theatrical unveiling of the 1993 movie, a licensed platformer of the same name was defrosted for the Genesis, SEGA CD, and SNES courtesy of game developers, Alexandria. A frenetic, 2D, scrolling shoot 'em up action tie-in that manages to improve upon the low bar set by its source material. I risk frostbite to connect the dots, assessing their respective merits side by side.